Oprah, the talk-show queen, gave the commencement address at Howard University Saturday, May 12. Of course the speech was inspirational, (be strong, believe in yourself, etc.) but it became a “transporting experience” through Oprah’s performance and demeanor.
Here’s the trick, according to Karen Bradley, a professor of dance and nonverbal communication at the U of Maryland, who was there:
• Oprah’s body movements and voice reinforce her words, a consistency that helps her seem “entirely authentic.” (Example: While referring to “blessings,” she held up one hand, palm facing the audience, as if to bestow a benediction on the crowd.) Bradley calls her “completely embodied — what someone is feeling internally is congruent with what they’re expressing. That’s what we call presence or charisma.”
• She’s engaged, not sneaking glances at her watch. Oprah sang along to every song and spoke to fellow participants onstage. “This is someone who knows she’s always being watched,” says Bradley. “She’s always absorbing and always expressing something. The impression I get from her is that she’s showing us how to be in the world.”
• Oprah cried when she received her honorary doctorate, then — instead of being embarrassed — turned toward the audience of 30,000. “There was a sense that this was her family, everyone there was family. I was crying, too… She used her emotions to feed her message.” – Washington Post
Food for thought next time you talk to a prospect in a busy place? Or alone, even?
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What if you could learn to tell your story so you can amaze and delight your customer niche: Here’s a book and CD program to help. And here’s help for talking in a human voice about your business – a CD set and cribsheet .
Whenever I call a prospect, I use a recording device to tape the conversation. That way I’m not taking notes and can give them my full attention.
I later transcribe the notes and delete the file. Then it’s not taking up lots of space on my computer and I can make sure I don’t miss something.
If you are talking to someone who is interested in your buiness, they could end up being the most important person you’ve ever talked to. Don’t they deserve your full attention?
Roxanne Green
Mentor With A Servant’s Heart
Amen, Roxanne!
We are not telemarketers reading from a script.
But talking one human being to another human being, offering the best of what we have to offer.
We stand to make a HUGE difference in the lives of many human beings… so let us e fully present and engaged.
I learn a LOT by watching Oprah. She is my favorite role model 🙂
Pat Crosby
http://NETWORKwithPAT.blogspot.com
I took a seminar with the Landmark Forum many years ago when it was still called EST. The title of the seminar was BE HERE NOW. If only we all treated our beings as our instrument. A musician who is watching the conductor for his entrance, reading his music and focusing on intonation and rhythm cannot afford to be distracted – he is totally in the moment – that is why trapeze artists can only focus on where they are at that moment. If we want to be successful and totally authentic when we inter-act with other people we have to make them feel that they are the only people in the room whether it is at Starbucks or at a candlelit dinner. As now is all we have and all the other distractions will be there afterwards anyway, what do we have to loose. Juliette Gray
healthywellthy1@aol.com
I think this also confirms what you’re trying to teach. When someone, Oprah or other, is not only “connected” to their audience – and – with their own truth can they make such an impact on an audience or individual.
To me, the moral of the story is… always come from your truth, your heart and don’t be afraid to let it show.
I love how Tim Sales approaches communication to leads/clients. He has several rules to follow when talking which have improved my skills. One of the most important ones for me is not to have any distractions during the conversation. This can be difficult since I have three preschoolers but I sneak away for a few minutes here and there throughout the day to achieve this. The most important rule though is to care about the person. Not just care that they could increase your paycheck but really care about them. This has changed how I look at phone leads. I actually enjoy doing them. I often hang up the phone not having gotten anywhere on my busines but feeling like I now have a friend. We have laughed, talk seriously, and enjoyed the time. I guess Oprah must have listened to Tim as well. (smile)
Sincerely,
Nancy Carlson @NMC
http://www.perfectmombusiness.com
Wow, Roxanne! What a great tip. I make notes so I don’t forget what we discussed and I admit that it does slow things down and take away from the spontaneity and from truly being in the moment. Thanks for sharing what you do. I will try that so I can be more present.
In review…….
Building relationships involves three elements:
1. Empathy
2. Being Genuine
3. Caring
All three involve being PRESENT. Especially the first two.
Being present involves no thinking, which is the only way to truly listen.
Dr. O
The skill of TRUE listening means alot to people. To be heard. People get the feeling when your not concerned. Good eye contact and listening makes people “hear” you. Talk to them, not at them.
Oprah is wonderful is how she treats people.
People can sense it when we are “NOT IN THE PRESENT”.
It’s important that we give our TOTAL attention to the person whom we are speaking to instead of darting our eyes around to see who we can “prospect” next.
By being in the present it also means we are telling the person whom we are speaking to that he or she is important.
One good place to start is to start at our home. Practise being in the present to your spouse, your parents, your in-laws, your children …
Warm regards
Tiat
P.S: Think of the air we breathe, think abundance. http://www.AbundanceLaw.com
I think Oprah has an innate ability to be authentic. She is who she is and people respond to that. I get the sense that Oprah sang along, not because she knew people were watching, but because that is the essence of Oprah.
I feel like when I am on the phone with prospects and I express enthusiasm it may come across as pushy, but I truly feel that this has been a life changing experience for me. How do I convey that sincerely and not scare people away.
Having been exposed to more companies since I started, I realize that there are some wonderful opportunities. I see MLM as an industry as a way for people to truly become who they want to be. It is a vehicle for personal growth and development.