"How to talk to a woman"

Episode One. “The closers are coming! The closers are coming!”

How many of you have been urged to bring your prospects to events so the top bananas can “close” them for you?

Does your company have a national tour coming up where they’ve pleaded with you to bring your best people, so the CEO or other electrifying top banana can explain everything once and for all, show them the vision, and then CLOSE all those skeptical prospects for you once and for all?

Close. Close. Close.

And we all learn that the closers are the most valuable people and get the biggest rewards.

Take the cherished fast start bonus for anyone who closes anyone else. The bigger the initial purchase by the “closee,” the bigger the payoff for the closer.

Plus all that stage time. The closers are the ones on stage – like the agressive young guys with the shiny new Gucci belt buckles they love to fondle.

The assumption behind all this activity is that 1) The close is paramount and 2) most people can’t “close” anyone because they are too weak, don’t know what to say, and need help from the closers.

It seems to me that the urge to close is a boy thing. Kind of like scoring. The more notches in that belt, the better. In fairness, it seems that nearly all salesmen are trained to close as often and as soon as possible.

However, in network marketing, this fixation on “the close” is quite distasteful – to the women.

First, women do not like to be “closed” – not on the first sales “date” or really ever. They don’t want to be dragged into the back seat on that first night, either.

Second, while we know men do enjoy the score, a woman seems to know that there’s more to it for her. She carries the baby for 9 months and cares for and nurtures her child another 18 years.

I have always believed that starting a business of your own is a little like having a baby. While the boys may like the score, anyone in business knows that developing something long-term requires caring for it, nurturing it, and usually for years to come. Plus working with one or two others in the beginning, and sometimes for years, is a process that takes time.

There’s much more to building a successful business than signing up or making that initial product purchase.

I believe that’s why women are not as quick to say “yes.” First we not like to be talked to and treated as a “score” or something to be “closed.” Second, many of us know that building up a viable long term business with regular customers requires caring and nurturing over several years, the first of which are the most important.

How about, instead of talking about closing us and our friends, you talk to us about what we might do to get long term customers? And maybe a good business partner or two over the next 3-5 years. So we can get ready, you know, to do it. And then be there – in case we need you.

Women are 80% of the network marketing profession. And until now, the silent, great majority.

P.S. The President of the DSA once said the drop out rate is 102%. Guess who most of them are?

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About the author

Kim Klaver


  • So love your sense of humor as you speak the truth! Everything you teach seems so basic, so logical, so simple – how did we get so lost over the years? No matter really – the important thing, for me, is that you speak to people getting in touch with themselves and what feels good and right for them. We all have blockages that we are not even aware of that keep us from what we say we want, and then we add bad habits to that – no wonder the attrition rate is now 102%! There were 3 gals who took advantage of your special last weekend and feel like they received a college course in what, 7-9 hours?!?. I hope more, like me, will do so more than once, for it can take much effort to correct the unconscious. Keep truckin’, Girl!

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